


How Did I Used To Get By?

by waywardstardust



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Brotzly - Freeform, Dghda, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, M/M, Mexican Funeral, Todd is a singer, dirk is dirk, it’s so fluffy, like I can’t believe I wrote this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-28
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-10 18:03:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13506891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waywardstardust/pseuds/waywardstardust
Summary: Todd has taken up singing & song-writing again, having given it up after the Mexican Funeral fiasco. His inspiration? A certain holistic detective.





	How Did I Used To Get By?

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: this is gonna sound sooo cheesy, but, I woke up one morning at like 4am with these lyrics and a melody (did I make it up? is it an existing song? I have no idea) in my head. I have no idea why. I couldn’t go back to sleep right away so I wrote them down & thought up the idea for this fic. I only now got around to writing it. I don’t know man.  
> WARNING: PURELY FLUFF which is weird coming from me

Dirk ran up the stairs giddily, two steps at a time. He could barely contain is excitement. They had a case!

  
It had been a nice few days of leisure time for the usually busy agency and Dirk had truly appreciated the break.

  
For the first day or two. Then he had started to get restless. There had been nothing to focus on.

It turned out that Todd enjoyed doing essentially nothing with he free time.

Todd had slept in, read some of his many music magazines and drank beer.

  
Dirk was happy to just spend time with Todd, he always was, but there was very little for him to do when Todd would pick up a magazine or mindlessly strum his guitar.

  
Simply put, Dirk had been bored.

  
But not anymore. They had a case!

  
True to his nature, Dirk had accidentally stumbled onto a curious case while simply walking along the street, on his way to pick up dinner for Todd and himself, which he immediately forgot when the universe decided to throw this case on his path.

  
Dirk had immediately started running towards the Ridgley, excited to inform Todd of their new case, involving ducklings of all things. Ducklings!

  
Dirk would’ve ran straight into the apartment once he reached the top of the stairs had he not tripped on his own feet and been thrown off balance for a moment. He regained his composure with a lighthearted giggle. That was close.

  
He was now outside of Todd’s apartment and ready to go in to announce the change of plans when he heard music from behind the door.

  
It was definitely Todd playing the guitar. Dirk had grown quite familiar with the way Todd played. But...

  
Was that Todd singing?

  
It was.

  
Todd’s surprisingly soft voice came through the door.

Dirk couldn’t help but blink for a few moments. He’d never heard Todd sing before. Of course he was aware of Todd’s previous ‘lead singer’ status with the Mexican Funeral, but he had never witnessed it.

Todd’s voice was beautiful. Dirk felt a warmth spread trough his chest at the sound.

  
Dirk didn’t know when he’d pressed his ear against the door, but when it suddenly flew open, reminding Dirk to fully close it the next time he ran out of the apartment, Dirk was taken by surprise.

  
As was Todd.

  
Todd lowered his guitar onto the couch and looked at his friend stumbling into the apartment.

They both blushed.

  
“Dirk? What... What are you doing?” Todd asked, embarrassed by the thought of Dirk hearing him sing.

  
“Oh. Oh, I was simply... Ah. I tripped in the stairs, you see, so I had to... Regain my composure and... Check for... Injuries.” Dirk explained. It wasn’t a lie. Not really. Just not the whole truth.

  
“Right.” Todd coughed. “You ok?”

  
“Oh yes! Tip top.” Dirk replied cheerily.

  
A silence fell in the apartment.

Dirk and Todd had become close in their time spent together and comfortable silences weren’t uncommon in their relationship.

  
This was not one of those. This was uncomfortable.

  
Dirk hated the feeling and decided to come out with it. “Were you singing just now?” He asked.

  
Todd’s eyes widened. “Heard that, did you?” He chuckled awkwardly, wanting nothing more than for the earth to swallow him whole.

  
“Yes. Unless, of course, you wish I didn’t which is something I can pretend to. Not to, I mean. Though it would be a shame, you have a lovely voice.” Dirk rambled.  
Todd blushed and cursed his body in his mind for betraying him in such a way.

  
“Uh, thanks, Dirk. I uh... Haven’t done a lot of it since Mexican Funeral.” Todd mumbled.

  
“Why?” Dirk asked.

  
Todd sighed. “I don’t know. I guess things ended so shitty with them, it felt... Weird, you know?” Todd explained.

  
Dirk nodded. “But now you’re singing again?” He asked.

  
Todd scratched the back of his neck. “I guess. Sometimes there’s just something you wanna write down, get out of your head, you know?” Todd shrugged.

  
“What’s that?” Dirk asked.

  
“What?” Todd was taken off-guard.

  
“What’s made you sing again after such a long time?” Dirk elaborated.

  
Todd swallowed. He really wished the universe would interrupt them now like it seemed to do so often, but nothing happened.

The silence dragged on.

Shit.

  
“You don’t have to tell me, of course, I have no right to ask you to share something so personal.” Dirk backtracked.

  
Todd felt bad. After everything they’d been through, he definitely didn’t want Dirk to think he didn’t trust him or see him as close a friend as he did.

He sighed.

This was going to be painful to explain.

  
“No, it... Uh, it’s just... A lot has happened recently. Or well, fairly recently. I just...” He took in a deep breath.

“It was about you.” He finally said, his voice low enough to be a whisper.

  
Dirk’s eyes widened. “About me?” He questioned.

  
“Yeah.” Todd replied simply.

  
Dirk seemed to be fighting with himself.

Todd could tell he wanted nothing more than to ask more questions but something was holding him back.

  
Todd decided to explain further before he lost his nerve. “You know, meeting you has changed, well, me, a lot so... Yeah. There’s some... Things I wanted to write down, when it came to that.” Todd explained, feeling himself blush more and more with each word.

  
Dirk nodded. “Yes, well. Suppose I’ve brought some quite eccentric situations into your daily life.” Dirk laughed awkwardly.

  
Todd shook his head. “No, it’s not... It’s not just that.” Todd said.

  
Dirk raised his eyebrows. “No?”

  
“No.” Todd replied.

  
“What... What then?” Dirk asked, his heart beat increasing for some reason.

  
“Uh, well... It’s just...” Todd stuttered.

  
“Can I hear it?” Dirk asked, almost shyly.

  
“You- What?” Todd asked, his voice slightly panicked.

  
“Well, if... You don’t want to explain what it’s about maybe you could... Play it? For me?” Dirk asked.

Todd seemed to ponder on this for a moment.

  
“I mean, well, if it’s about me... Does that give me some sort of special privilege to be the first to hear it?” Dirk continued awkwardly.

  
Todd laughed. “I wasn’t planning on letting anyone hear it, honestly.” He said.

  
Dirk nodded. “Oh. That’s alright. I understand.” He said and walked into the kitchen.

  
Todd closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He knew he’d have to talk to Dirk about his feelings at some point. Might as well let him know through the song.

Todd cringed. Jesus, when did he become someone who let their crush know about their feelings by singing to them?

  
The universe really didn’t like him, because if it did, it would send a lighting and strike him down right now.

  
“Dirk?” Todd exclaimed before he worked himself up into a panic attack and excessive amount of self-loathing.

  
“Yes?” Dirk replied.

  
“Come here.” Todd said as he picked up his guitar.

  
“Why?” Dirk furrowed his brows.

  
“Just... Come here.” Todd sighed.

  
Dirk sat himself in front of Todd on the couch.

  
“Just... Go easy on me, okay? I’m... It’s been a while.” Todd said.

  
“Oh, Todd, I’m sure you’re wonderful.” Dirk said in a cheery voice.

  
“Thanks... But also... If you don’t... If you don’t like the song, just... Be nice about it, yeah?” Todd asked in a quiet voice, no longer able to look Dirk in the eye.

  
“I’m sure I’ll love it!” Dirk replied.

  
Todd sighed. There was no way to convince Dirk of anything else without telling him what the song was about.

  
“Right. Okay. Now, it’s not finished. I’ve just got a chorus, so...” Todd cleared his throat. “Anyway. Here we go...” He said and started strumming out the first chords of the chorus.

  
Dirk swung lightly to the music up until Todd started singing. Dirk stilled and focused on every word.

“You’ve turned my whole world upside down,

  
by simply rolling into town,

  
inserted yourself into my life,

  
how did I used to get by?”

Todd dared to glance at Dirk while playing and found him staring intently with his mouth slightly open.

Todd lowered his eyes at his guitar again.

“You’ve made me into a better man,

  
to face the things from which I ran.

  
Whatever life throws in our way,

  
just know I want you to stay.

  
All’s gone crazy but I know something true,

  
you’ve made me fall in love with you...”

Todd’s voice faded away with the last chords and Dirk felt like his heart stopped for a moment.

Todd felt like he might faint. He was sure he meant every word, but he had not prepared for Dirk to hear them.

  
Todd held his breath, waiting for Dirk’s reaction. The detective stayed frozen.

  
Todd started to feel uncomfortable and cleared his throat.

  
“So, yeah, I don’t-“

  
“Is that really about me?” Dirk finally spoke, cutting Todd off.

  
Todd stared at Dirk with a surprised expression on his face.

“W-what?” He asked.

  
“Is that really about me?” Dirk repeated the question.

  
Todd laughed awkwardly. “Well, yeah, I mean... Who else could it possibly be about?” He replied.

  
Nothing in Dirk’s expression changed.

  
“Ahem, anyway, you wanted to hear it, so... There. We can forget about it if you w-“ Todd was caught of by the Brit throwing his arms around Todd, squashing his guitar in between their bodies.

  
“Woah.” Todd exhaled.

  
“Thank you, Todd.” Dirk said.

  
Todd finally placed his hands around Dirk’s back.

“Uh, for what?” He asked.

  
“No one’s ever written me a song before.” Dirk replied softly.

  
“Oh. Well. You’re welcome?” Todd said hesitantly.

  
Dirk’s arms simply tightened around Todd.

  
Eventually Dirk pulled away and grinned at Todd.

Todd felt confused.

  
“So... You liked it? The song?” Todd asked carefully.

  
“I loved it!” Dirk exclaimed.

  
“Good, good... So... That’s it?” Todd asked, a very physical feeling of anxiety rearing its head in his chest.

  
“What do you mean?” Dirk asked.

  
“Well, how do you feel about... You know, what the song is... basically about? The... The love part.” Todd mumbled.

  
“I feel happy?” Dirk replied but it sounded like a question, like Dirk was unsure why Todd has asked such a thing.

They stared at each other for a moment.

  
“Do you understand what it means?” Todd finally asked.

  
“I believe so.” Dirk replied.

  
“Okay. So... Jesus, Dirk, you’re killing me here.” Todd groaned.

  
Dirk furrowed his brows. “How so?”

Todd closed his eyes in frustration.

“I just told you I’m in love with you! Are you really not gonna make a comment?” Todd exclaimed.

  
Dirk was surprised by Todd’s outburst.

“Oh. Oh, you mean...? Oh, Todd, I love you, too! Obviously!” Dirk exclaimed.

  
Todd blinked a few times.

“Obviously?” He deadpanned.

Dirk threw his hands in the air.

“Well I thought so! I guess not. Oh dear, I’m sorry, I should’ve said it, shouldn’t I?” He asked.

  
Todd blinked a few more times before bursting out laughing.

  
Dirk looked surprised.

“What? What’s so funny?” He asked.

  
Todd placed the guitar on the floor next to their feet and then wrapped Dirk in a hug, all the while still laughing.

  
“Oh Dirk...” He chuckled, a weight falling off his chest and replaced by a feeling of warmth.

  
“I love you.” He said. Now that he’d said it, or well, implied it at first, he felt like he wanted to repeat it. All the time.

  
Dirk smiled happily, still unsure of the reason behind Todd’s laughter but he found he didn’t care.

  
“I love you, too, Todd.”

  
They stayed like that for a while.

Neither knew how much time had passed. The moment was interrupted by Todd’s stomach growling.

Dirk laughed as they pulled away.

  
“Weren’t you supposed to pick up dinner?” Todd asked.

  
Dirk’s eyes widened and he clapped his hands together. “Oh! Oh! Todd! We have a case!” He exclaimed.

  
Todd rolled his eyes fondly. “Of course we do.”


End file.
